"You are so strong." It's meant to be a compliment, I know, but it's one of the most frustrating things to hear. It's not true.
Do you see all these strong women posts on facebook like I do? "She believed she could, so she did", "A strong woman is able to smile in the morning like she wasn't crying last night", "She wasn't looking for a knight, she was looking for a sword". That's just a taste of some of the stuff out there for the warrior women of this world.
Over the years, I've had many people comment to me about how strong I am. That they admire that in me and wish they were like that. I never really understood why it rubbed me the wrong way, but suddenly God is peeling back those layers to cause me to realize that it's not true. I am not strong. I am very weak. If you knew me, you would know just how true that is.
I crumble all the time. Sometimes daily. Sometimes several times a day. I get lonely. I get angry about my life. I get stressed out over finances. Especially these days. Things are so expensive and my minimal margin is getting smaller and smaller by the day. I get jealous. I look at the wicked people in this world and I get angry. Why are they prospering, while the righteous suffer? I just had a friend whos husband died unexpectantly. Why do good men die and evil ones live? Why is our world so broken? Why is our society so corrupt, sinful, and wicked? Why do lies reign as "truth"? Why are people allowed to be angry over thier sin being called sin? Why are they allowed to call us, God's children, racist, bigots, homophobic, hypocritical? Why are we forced to suffer under corrupt and evil tyranical politicians? Why has our world become a modern day Babylon? And why do I have to be so afraid for my kids? I am scared. I am tired. I am lonely. I am angry. I am fearful. I am sad. I am not strong. I am not strong at all. Don't call me strong.
I am not strong. I am weak. God is strong.
Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:7b-10
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